hello friend

Hey. It’s Friday. I hope you and the people you are close to are well. Well it’s been another week. Ups. Downs. Wiggles to the left and to the right. I nipped to the shops. I nearly cried in the car after. All I did was buy beer and that was enough. It occurred to me that I’ve spoken to less than 10 people I know in 2 months. Other than my wife I’ve had 2 meaningful conversations longer than 10 minutes. Is my anxiety because I’m out of practice being in the world?


Over on ye olde Instagram I’ve been posting my 10 year journey from Light Night 2010 to Light Night 2020. Unfortunately Light Night 2020 isn’t going ahead in meat space only the virtual space. If you don’t know Light Night is a yearly event where the city of Liverpool comes alive after 5pm with a series of arts and cultural events. Museums and galleries stay open late. There are new commissions and art works in the public space. It is an absolute joy and my favourite event to work each year. It is sorely missed. Go check out my Instagram for the pics. It’s been a joy looking through them again. Also my mate Mark has done a great video of his work over the years. We never meet on the night so it’s cool to see another side to the night.

I thought you might like to see the outside world again. Here’s some landscapes in New Brighton.

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mental health

Over the past few weeks I’ve been trying to work out how I’m ok. I’m afraid I don’t have an answer for you. This week I had to think about money which made me think about how to make money which made me think and so on till I was curled up in a ball. Today I was nearly crying after buying beer from a shop because… ? So I’m not ok. It’s ok to not be ok. Except, money. I’ve been harping on about the importance of mental health for weeks now from the intellectual comfort of my office. It is a seriously important thing to take care of but the reality can be that for some they can’t afford to take care of it. I would love to enjoy this calm lifestyle of playing games, fixing little house issues and baking but soon I need to get back to making serious money. Most people will be looking forward to that. I am anxious. I’m always anxious. That’s my secret Cap.

I had hoped this pause button that has been pressed upon the world would free my mind. It has not.

Take care all. Remember to talk.

beam out

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