I Tip Toe, But Should I?

Russel T. Davis (RTD), the man behind the reboot of Doctor Who, is back on our screens in the form of Tip Toe. A 5 part show on Channel 4 staring Alan Cumming (Night Crawler from X-Men 2) and David Morrisey (Random bad guy from The Walking Dead), and it’s very good. For two people who have previously played clear cut good and bad guys, it’s interesting to see them both play normal messed up humans. At times I doubted whether the bad guy, was really a bad guy.

I highly recommend you watch the show. It’s a discussion on what it is to be young and queer, old and queer, to be a white football fan with an every day job and a gay neighbour. It’s a look at the times, and wondering if they really are a changing. Was it better in the 90s or is that just rose tinted nostalgia? After watching all 5 episodes, I was left wondering if it’s a view of today, or tomorrow or whether RTD is catasrophising. If you read nothing but bad news all day, the world can seem like a bad place. But then step outside and say “Good morning” to you neighbours, and maybe it isn’t all that bad?

Susan Sontag once suggested that 10% of any population is cruel no matter what, 10% is merciful no matter what, and the remaining 80% can be moved in either direction. It’s “not a statistic. It’s a mirror”.

And right now, a lot of things are trying to move that 80%.

We’ve had a decade of being told that the problems in our lives are caused by people who are different from us. That the NHS is broken because of immigrants. That your kids can’t get jobs because of DEI. That society is being undermined by trans people using the wrong toilets. None of it stands up to scrutiny, but scrutiny requires energy, and it’s much easier to be angry at someone visible.

Can you list all the times trans rights were a major political issue before Brexit? Because I’m struggling. It’s been ten years, and in that time just how much of their scaremongering has come true? Almost none of it I would imagine, but they need to keep pushing it to gain power. In the last 10 years how many times has a trans woman won at sports at the expense of a “real” woman? Almost none, but you know it could happen so they ban it before it can. Just to be safe. How many times has a trans woman peed in the woman’s toilets without issue? Millions, and nothing has happened... but it might... just you see.

What has happened is that on average 300 trans and non-binary people are killed each year world wide. That’s roughly 3,000 in 10 years. Killed, for being themselves. Somewhere in the world, a person like me puts on a skirt and another person shoots them. In the last 10 years the UK’s score on LGBTQ rights has fallen from 86% in 2015, 52% in 2024, 46% in 2025, to 44% in 2026. We were 1st in Europe in 2015 and are now 22nd. Our rights are being eroded so others can gain power.

Change like this happens gradually, then all at once. And the point at which most people notice is usually the point at which it’s already quite difficult to reverse. Which, to me, is what the show seems to be saying.

The show asks the question, “What happens when someone believes all the lies and misinformation of 2026? What happens when their own failings lead them to need someone to blame instead because its easier than working on their issues?” One person on their own can be problematic. A gang, can be a serious problem. A population?

Maybe I’m overthinking and letting my anxiety get the better of me. That is what my autistic brain does. But then, attacking and normalising hatred of minorities is what the right and those who want power do. We need to speak out and remind people of this. They’ll come for one, then another and another and another because none of these people are the cause but they are easy to blame.

In recent months I’ve started thinking maybe I should wear a skirt less, makeup less, be queer less. Maybe I should take measures now to slowly fade into the background, to wear less colourful clothes and appear to be a “normal” man. Because right now I stand out. If I go out and shine, then men stare at me. They beep their horns, film me on their phones, and say homophobic slurs to my face. What’s worse is that sometimes it comes from people you thought you knew, who have spent their lives being a pillar of the community. What’s worse is the community backs them not me, for simply wearing a skirt.

At one point someone in the show wonders if we made a mistake by coming out as a community. Should we have stayed in the closet? Maybe we were safer when the world was unaware of us. It’s a valid question, but it could be seen as victim shaming. If you don’t look gay then they can’t attack you. Is that not the same as telling a woman she was asking for it in a short skirt? Am I asking for it in a short skirt? No, we’re not the issue. The issue is the misinformation, those who wield it and those who believe it. Which is easy to type, but seemingly impossible to fight. So, I leave my skirts in the closet.

It’s Pride Month this month. I bought myself a new pair of rainbow bikini bottoms to go swimming in, and to happily look silly in because it’s a silly old world. But it’s not a silly old world. It’s one slowly tip toeing into a very dark place.

Links

• courn 안 on Instagram. so I use these terms interchangeably a lot around here and turns out a lot of folks don’t know that nonbinary folks are under the trans umbrella…now you know 🌈
• Has AI Already Killed How-To Nonfiction? Sales Trends, My Personal Data, and What It Might Mean for the Future - The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss. My head has been spinning after getting a spreadsheet roughly a week ago.
• Free Crochet Pattern: Pride Shawl. A classic triangular crochet granny shawl with a simple border, in the colours of the progress pride flag. It's perfect for beginners, works up quickly and is one of those great crochet projects that doesn't take a lot of brain power; you can crochet away mindlessly in front of the tv, on the bus, in the pub - wherever!
• Virgin Atlantic Launches Autism Training For Staff. Shaun Heasley reported for Disability Scoop earlier this month Virgin Atlantic is training its staff on how best to interact with autistic passengers. The airline is working with accessible travel organization Autism Double-Checked in organizing this effort.
• The most radical act in an age of outrage is to play. In a culture driven by outrage and constant alerts, play may be the simplest way to reclaim focus, resilience, and human connection. /via Documentally
• Sarah Rose (@thesarahrose.bsky.social). The good taxpayers of New York have given me a pair of Meta glasses because I am low vision disabled, and I seem to have used them more than a lot of people on here, so let me say a little about my experiences...